Issue 7 • Fall 2003 • Drama
Taylor Mac BowyerScene VIIScene VII
MAG is asleep in a hospital bed. She wakes up to knocking.
JOSEPH
Hello. (JOSEPH pokes his head in. He's clutching on to a teddy bear, obviously intended for MAG's baby but one gets the impression it's more for him. He holds on to the bear throughout the rest of the scene and leaves without giving it to her. He has a black eye.) I stopped by to see your little girl again. She looks a lot better now, they cleaned her all up.
MAG
She doing all right?
JOSEPH
(entering) She's fine. How about you?
MAG
I'm a little loopy. Drugs, don't ya know. They wanna keep me for a couple days.
JOSEPH
Yeah, I figured. Do you need anything?
MAG
I can take care of myself.
JOSEPH
Just thought...
MAG
Thanks. I'm sorry, about the eye.
JOSEPH
It's okay.
MAG
You shouldn't have slapped the baby.
JOSEPH
You're supposed to slap them to make them cry.
MAG
Why?
JOSEPH
To make sure they're alive.
MAG
Couldn't you just look at her to tell that.
JOSEPH
Well... sure, but that's what they do.
MAG
Who?
JOSEPH
Doctors.
MAG
Well, they shouldn't.
JOSEPH
Did you think of a name?
MAG
Not yet.
JOSEPH
You know they make you name her or they won't release you.
MAG
That can't possibly be true.
JOSEPH
They do.
MAG
I'll just walk out with her.
JOSEPH
You can't.
MAG
Watch me.
JOSEPH
Why not just name her?
MAG
Maybe I'll let her name herself.
JOSEPH
People like to be called things.
MAG
Called names?
JOSEPH
Well... course she's not really a person yet, more like a little spirit.
MAG
Yeah.
Lights up on GRIFFIN and RED in the truck.
GRIFFIN
Thank you. For doing this.
RED
I hope they're still there.
GRIFFIN
Red, what happened to your teeth?
RED
Too many evil spirits living in 'em. It upset me at first but there's something quite liberating about being able to plop your teeth down to let the gums breathe.
GRIFFIN
My mother says your teeth are God's pearls.
RED
Mine must be his trees.
GRIFFIN
Are they wood?
RED
You want to come live with me for awhile?
GRIFFIN
I just met you.
RED
So?
GRIFFIN
I don't think so.
RED
Why not?
GRIFFIN
You're a nice person but...
RED
But you got some place to go? It seems to me you're just roaming around 'cause you don't have anywhere to go. Am I right?
GRIFFIN
No.
RED
Why not then?
GRIFFIN
I don't know.
RED
How about I come with you? I did burlesque in Mexico City. Never been to a volcano. How about I come along?
GRIFFIN
I don't think that would be such a good idea.
RED
Why not?
GRIFFIN
Okay.
RED
Okay?
GRIFFIN
We'll pick up my teeth and go straight on to Mexico.
RED
Great. (sings) "Mexico ho here I come, right back where I started from." Hey maybe it'll explode. Wouldn't that be fantastic?
GRIFFIN
I don't think it works anymore.
RED
Shhhh, don't spoil the fantasy.
JOSEPH
I just came to check up on you. Say good-bye. You sure you're all right? I'll let you alone. Thank you. For the experience. Thanks.
MAG
Would you lay on top of me?
JOSEPH
What?
RED
Hey, put your arms outside the truck.
GRIFFIN
Why?
RED
Just do it. Am I the only spontaneous person left on the planet? Put them out. Like Superman.
MAG
Would you mind laying on me?
JOSEPH
Just lay on top of you?
MAG
Yeah.
JOSEPH
I don't know. What if somebody...
MAG
Never mind.
JOSEPH
No, I'll do it, it's just, what if somebody came in?
MAG
I'm not asking you to fuck me.
JOSEPH
No... I didn't... no.
MAG
Forget it.
JOSEPH
No, I'm sure... I'd like that.
MAG
I don't want you to now.
JOSEPH
Okay.
GRIFFIN
A bug just flew in my mouth.
RED
No, peaches, your mouth just flew into a bug.
GRIFFIN
My arms are getting tired.
RED
You don't get any sensation at all?
GRIFFIN
Numb. I feel numb.
RED
(sings) "Every party has a pooper that's why we invited Cooper. Party pooper. Griffin Cooper."
GRIFFIN
What exact sensation should I be looking for?
RED
I'm joining you.
GRIFFIN
You've gotta steer.
RED
That's why Mitakuye Oyasin invented thighs. (RED hangs out her side of the window, steering with her thigh and coasting down hill.) You feel something yet.
GRIFFIN
I'm scared.
RED
It's a start.
MAG
I changed my mind. You can do it again.
JOSEPH
Oh. Okay. How should I...
MAG
Just do it, no talking. (JOSEPH starts to get on top but doesn't know which way to face.) Face up please.
RED
WAHOOOOOO. Scream with me, peaches. We're flying. We're sprouting wings. WAHOOOOOOO.
RED continues to scream, after a bit GRIFFIN joins in. JOSEPH is now on top of MAG. MAG softly verbalizes Joseph's heartbeat.
MAG
Bubump bubump bubump
RED
I am the great red eagle. What are you, peaches? What are you?
GRIFFIN
I'm a bird, too.
RED
You can't be a bird. I'm a bird. What are you?
GRIFFIN
I'm Superman.
RED
No, already used.
GRIFFIN
I'm a giant hot air balloon.
RED
That will do. (sings) "Up up and away in my beautiful, my beautiful balloon."
RED and GRIFFIN break out of the truck and flap there arms like they're flying over the country side. RED flaps offstage. GRIFFIN is left alone with his arms outstretched. LEN walks on with a school backpack and books. He watches GRIFFIN. It's ten years earlier.
LEN
What are you doing?
GRIFFIN
Huh?
LEN
Sorry, I scared you.
GRIFFIN
No.
LEN
What were you doing?
GRIFFIN
Nothing.
LEN
Okay. It's cold.
GRIFFIN
Yeah.
LEN
My folks are gone. Wanna come over?
GRIFFIN
Sure.
LEN
Wanna kiss me? I shouldn't have said that. I should have just done it. People usually don't say no if you just do something 'cause it feels better than you would have imagined right? Should have just done it. It's cold.
GRIFFIN
Yeah.
LEN
Did you still want to come over?
GRIFFIN
Yeah.
LEN
Don't worry, it'll end soon.
GRIFFIN
What?
LEN
Being so awkward. It's bound to eventually.
MAG
What's your kid's name?
JOSEPH
Jonathan. We found it in a book. He lives with his mother most of the time. I go visit him at school. We have lunch together. I always bring lots of good food 'cause the kids, they're into trading lunches. They always huddle up around me so they can get in on the good stuff. You should see their faces light up. A simple thing, like getting to trade the bad stuff in your lunch for something real juicy... I always pack a good lunch for them. I see him a lot. He seems okay. I miss him. He's doing all right. I thought about bringing him by to see your girl. That be okay?
MAG
We won't be staying much longer.
JOSEPH
Sure, but long enough for...
MAG
Does he know you're a homo? Your son?
JOSEPH
Are you sure I can't call anyone for you? Do you have a husband?
MAG
There is no father, I had an immaculate conception.
JOSEPH
Oh.
LEN and GRIFFIN inch their way towards each other during the following story.
MAG
You think there comes a time when you have to figure out, there couldn't possibly be anything less attractive than someone who's not attracted to you? Years ago, I'm in high school, and I'm in love with this boy. There's this guy who always yells faggot to him whenever he passes him in the hall, and I think, "It's okay, I know you're not a faggot because I love you and have always loved you and know that one day we'll marry and you'll become this great something and I'll become a marine biologist even though I hate biology class and I'll save whales and we'll have a pet dolphin in the back yard that will do tricks for our kids and when we come back to school for our 20th anniversary everyone will see how you were just a sensitive young man who was perfectly normal and we'll be named King and Queen of the 20th anniversary ball and even though we know we're too good for such frivolous things we'll (MAG watches LEN and GRIFFIN) and he looks back at me as if to say, "Yes but which one of us would be crowned the queen?" And then he starts dating my brother. Lenny. Sad.
JOSEPH
It's charming.
MAG
Oh, the faggot thinks it's charming. Sorry. I'm too young to be bitter. I'm too young to be a mom. I'm too young to have varicose veins. Something is seriously wrong with me.
JOSEPH
You don't have varicose veins.
MAG
Look. (JOSEPH touches her leg.) That doesn't gross you out?
JOSEPH
It looks like a flower.
MAG
(regarding how sickeningly sweet the flower image is) Oh, God.
JOSEPH
Does it hurt?
MAG
Not anymore than my cooch.
JOSEPH
You're a beautiful young woman.
MAG
You want a baby?
JOSEPH
What?
MAG
I was joking.
JOSEPH
You shouldn't joke about things like that.
MAG
I guess that means you don't want her.
JOSEPH
Shhhh.
JOSEPH lays back down on her. They watch LEN and GRIFFIN.
LEN
Ever been to Mexico?
GRIFFIN
Tijuana.
LEN
Yeah? Ever been to the Rio Grande?
GRIFFIN
Is that in Mexico?
LEN
New Mexico. A million-year-old river expanding huge protective rock. Nothing awkward about it. I like that. Things that don't disappear just... disseminate. Never been. Mexico/New Mexico. Want to. Want to go every... (GRIFFIN kisses LEN.) What was Tijuana like?
GRIFFIN
Extremely awkward.
RED comes flying on with the truck. LEN runs off.
RED
(sings) "I want to fly like an eagle, to the sea. Fly like an eagle let my hmmm hmmmm carry me."
GRIFFIN and RED
(sing) "Fly like an eagle, to the sea. Fly like an eagle let my hmmm hmmm carry me".
RED
Oh, shit. (RED was about to hit something. She and GRIFFIN jump back in the bench/truck.) That was close. Ha. Riding through the countryside, like roller skating through the Louvre. Passing all them Monets, Cézannes, Rousseaus, Crazy depressed Van Goghs.
GRIFFIN
My dad went into this deep whacked-out depression one time.
RED
Did he cut his ear off?
GRIFFIN
No, it was like an entire lifetime of holding in all his emotions came out at once. Brought on by Casper.
RED
The friendly ghost?
GRIFFIN
The dog. My dysfunctional family decides to get this miniature dachshund. My mother's shrink told her it would solve the family problems if we had some little thing to take care of. Surprisingly, when we weren't throwing rocks at the poor little yap dog, it really worked. We loved this dog. The kind of love a mother hamster must have while eating her young, but we loved him.
RED
Lovely.
GRIFFIN
Especially dad. He is so enamored by little Casper that he lets it sit on his lap while he hand feeds the dog peanuts. Only he doesn't just hand feed him the peanuts he peels them 'cause Casper hates that paper coating on the peanuts. He does this every night and Casper keeps getting fatter and fatter. Until everywhere he goes he whimpers 'cause his stomach and balls drag on the ground.
RED
Oh, dear.
GRIFFIN
So dad decides Casper needs to get some exercise. He starts taking him on these long walks in the forest. So, one day Casper's running...
RED
Hopping you mean, miniature wiener dogs don't run, they hop.
GRIFFIN
He's hopping around through the forest when all of a sudden dad hears this yelp. He races off in the direction of the yelp, and there, lying in the tall grass is Casper with his enormous peanut stomach lying out of his body. He picks Casper up...
RED
...and his stomach?
GRIFFIN
And his stomach and races him to the vet.
RED
What happened?
GRIFFIN
A bobcat go hold of him.
RED
This is exciting.
GRIFFIN
So about ten thousand dollars later we bring home a very weak but alive little wiener dog. We had to put newspaper down all over the floor 'cause the poor dog has this tube sticking out of him that leaks yellow fluid everywhere. But he's okay, as okay as a dog can be that's had his stomach separated from its body.
RED
This made your pops have a nervous break down?
GRIFFIN
No, I'm just starting. A month goes by and Casper is doing really good, right. So dad decides to take him out again, God only knows why after the last experience.
RED
I don't want to hear this.
GRIFFIN
Casper's running... hopping through the forest, he goes behind this bush and once more we hear the infamous yelp. The entire family goes racing down to the sound of the noise and we see Casper's little butt and tail in this bush. "Yea, Casper's alive, we thought you got eaten by the bob cat, yea." Dad moves the bush back... and that's all that was left. Just his little butt and tail, sticking out of a bush. The bob cat took off with just half the dog. So my father, who I'd never seen cry a day in my life, lost absolute control and couldn't stop for a month. This man, who would ask my mother for a boob job every Christmas, who drinks beer in the shower, who's never given me a word of encouragement ever, is so destroyed over the death of the family wiener dog he can't get out of bed. Literally can't get out of bed for a month.
RED
(playing psychiatrist) It was a substitution.
GRIFFIN
Well, sure... but... my friend's dead.
RED
Casper?
GRIFFIN
No. My friend who belongs to the teeth. Len, that's his name. He's not really dead yet, but...
RED
AIDS? Fag bash? Cyanide-laced Kool-Aid?
MAG
Hey, I don't know your name.
JOSEPH
Joseph.
GRIFFIN
So now I run around like a chicken with my head cut off
sticking my dick in anything I can find trying to make a fit. Nothing fits.
MAG
Thanks, Joseph.
JOSEPH
Anytime.
RED
Anything?
GRIFFIN
I didn't mean...
MAG sees GRIFFIN's necklace around JOSEPH's neck.
MAG
Wait. Where did you get that?
RED
Yes, you did.
JOSEPH
What? (MAG pulls the necklace off of JOSEPH.) Hey.
MAG
Where did you get this?
JOSEPH
Give it back.
MAG
It's not yours.
JOSEPH
Yes it is.
MAG
Liar.
GRIFFIN
I'm...
RED
Don't apologize.
JOSEPH
You know him?
MAG
None of your business.
JOSEPH
Well, you obviously do. He gave it to me.
MAG
Liar. He has an unnatural fixation on these teeth. He wouldn't give them to me, he's not going to hand them over to some stranger.
JOSEPH
I wasn't a stranger.
GRIFFIN
We use to tangle ourselves up in some crazy knot. Like primates. I'd think, "How nice it is to get back to the basics...
MAG
Did you treat him good?
GRIFFIN
...Food...
JOSEPH
I tried.
GRIFFIN
...Contact...
JOSEPH
I'm not very experienced, that way.
GRIFFIN
...Sex...
MAG
Where is he now?
GRIFFIN
...Sleep...
JOSEPH
I don't know.
GRIFFIN
...Play."
JOSEPH
He didn't...
GRIFFIN
I always felt so small around him.
MAG
He didn't say?
GRIFFIN
Not unimportant small, small like how it feels to look up at the stars.
JOSEPH
No, he didn't.
MAG
Good.
GRIFFIN
I'd think, wow, I'm part of all that.
MAG
Maybe you'd better go.
JOSEPH
Yeah.
MAG
Okay.
JOSEPH
Okay.
JOSEPH exits clutching the teddy bear.
GRIFFIN
It's such a cliché. Why'd he have to go like a cliché?
RED
That's all death is, baby.
MAG gets up and starts to gather her things. LEN enters and sets up the next scene. They look at each other. MAG exits. LEN gets rid of the bed.
Next Page:
Scene VIII (page 10 of 12 pages)
All Pages: See the entire play on one page
Table of Contents: The Hot Month
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Taylor Mac Bowyer's plays include The Hot Month (recipient of the Ensemble Studio Theater's "Next-Step Fellowship"), Red Tide Blooming, Dilating (an evening of one-acts), The Levee (published by Vintage), Blue Grotto, and the solo-play Okay. He is a member of the Circle Repertory Lab and has acted with The Jean Cocteau Repertory, Mabou Mines, Dixon Place, and at several regional theaters. As drag performer, Taylor Mac, he has performed in venues such as Joe's Pub, FEZ, and the San Francisco Opera House.
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