Lodestar Quarterly

Lodestar Quarterly
Figure reaching for a star Issue 8 • Winter 2003 • Featured Writer • Drama

Marla's Devotion

Linda Eisenstein

Scene 2

Scene 2

No break in continuity. Lights shift, coming up on MARLA and JOEY's living room.

MARLA is still doing her routine from Scene 1.

JOEY, MARLA's lover, is bustling around drinking coffee, getting her briefcase ready for work.

JOEY
Zoom, zoom, zoom. Time to get cracking.

MARLA
What time do you want dinner?

JOEY
Dinner is doubtful. Depositions most of the day, then court. That means the drive-through and the law library tonight.

MARLA
Oh. Which case is it? The slime bag one?

JOEY
That doesn't narrow it down, Marla. Okay, you remember the one, she was ironing the prick bastard's shirts, and the prick bastard took the iron and --

MARLA
(hands over her ears) Oooh, stop, no more! (She takes a big breath, makes the next prostration an especially mindful one.)

JOEY
Yes, my practice is such a jolly picnic lately. Also I gotta file a couple more restraining orders and... (finally noticing what MARLA is doing) What's that, yoga?

MARLA
Kind of.

JOEY
That's the same one you were doing before my shower. Shouldn't you move on to a different exercise?

MARLA
It's something I'm trying out. From that article I was reading? These two monks did this as a devotion. Every two steps, they'd kneel down and do a full prostration.

JOEY
What the hell did they do that for?

MARLA
The article didn't say. For mindfulness, I guess. They walked between two temples in California like this.

JOEY
Jeez. I'll bet their knees were sore. Goodbye kiss.

JOEY leans down to MARLA. They peck their morning goodbye.

MARLA
(arms around JOEY's neck, trying to hold her) Joey --

JOEY
Gotta run, babe.

MARLA
You're working late an awful lot lately.

JOEY
(pulling away) Can't be helped right now.

MARLA
I hardly see you.

JOEY
It's wacko season, okay? Hey, do me a favor. Stop by the cleaners on your way to class, all right?

MARLA
I...I don't think I'm going.

JOEY
Marla, don't cut class again.

MARLA
What's the point, anyway?

JOEY
Marla, it's simple. You go to class, you actually complete your assignments and turn them in, and eventually they hand you a diploma.

MARLA
Well, I'll go tomorrow. Right now I need to get the hang of this.

JOEY
The hang of what.

MARLA
This. This practice. It's really fascinating.

JOEY
Aw, jeez...

MARLA
I feel like I need to get more mindfulness and devotion in my life.

JOEY
You need to get more completed credit hours into your life so you can fucking graduate!

MARLA
You don't have to yell.

MARLA does deep breathing through JOEY's mini-rant, trying to tune it out.

The following overlaps a lot.

JOEY
I'm not yelling. You and that goddamn magazine. I dread, I absolutely dread the day it comes.

MARLA
You're so angry all the time.

JOEY
You always start in with some kind thing,

MARLA
At the drop of a hat, you yell, Joey.

JOEY
some kind of hapless New Age bullshit.

MARLA
Buddhism isn't exactly New Age.

JOEY
I have to tell you that the very idea of this pisses me off.

MARLA
It's only, like, 3,000 years old or something.

JOEY
Pardon me for saying so, Marla, but you of all people do not need more contact with a religious ideology that says your ego identity is an illusion.

MARLA
Like you know anything about Buddhism.

JOEY
You think I haven't read your stupid magazine? There's never anything else to read in the john. That, or the Miracles of the Bootie-satvas.

MARLA
Bodhisattvas. (BO-DEE-SAHT-VAHS)

JOEY
Whatever.

MARLA
I think it's a beautiful concept. Compassionate egoless saints who resist giving themselves over to total bliss until all sentient beings in the world are enlightened.

JOEY
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, let me tell ya what I noticed about your Bootie-satvas, Marla. Most of 'em are men. And they all had a bunch of years soldiering and screwing and carrying on before they saw the light and got all holy. That's what women need. Spend some time building up their ego's muscles, creating some havoc and a good fight. Then they can let go of it. Otherwise what you got is just another doormat for the Patriarchy.

MARLA
I don't think you get it, Joey.

JOEY
Now maybe this groveling on the ground would be good for monks.

MARLA
Life does not have to be a war.

JOEY
Male monks.

MARLA
This helps you breathe easier.

JOEY
But getting down on your knees every 30 seconds? I think this is a really screwed up thing for a lesbian to be doing.

MARLA
It concentrates the mind, too.

JOEY
This is a bid for attention, that's what it is.

MARLA
No it's not.

JOEY
For my attention. Christ, you've already made me late.

MARLA
So go to work, Joey.

JOEY
A struggle for control. This, this is a very male thing you're doing.

MARLA
So what. If I were struggling for control in a female way I would eat and throw up. I prefer this. (breathes) It's rather peaceful when you inhale before the two steps, then exhale as you go prone. (goes prone) Actually, I think I'll stay down here for a while.

JOEY
Honest to God, Marla, I really cannot have you doing this to my life all the time. I have to get to work!

MARLA
Go right ahead. This isn't about you, anyway.

JOEY
Oh, sure.

MARLA
This is about me.

JOEY
You know, you're going to be in a world of hurt soon. Wait'll you have to get to the bathroom.

MARLA
I'll just have to plan ahead. No one said you have to get very far. It took those monks two and a half years to go fifty miles.

JOEY
When you get the runs? Don't say I didn't warn you.

JOEY exits.

Next Page:   Scene 3   (page 4 of 10 pages)

All Pages:   See the entire play on one page

Table of Contents:   Marla's Devotion

Linda Eisenstein

Linda Eisenstein's plays and musicals have had over 100 productions throughout the world. Her award-winning plays include Three the Hard Way, The Names of the Beast, Marla's Devotion, Discordia, Star Wares: The Next Generation, and Rehearsing Cyrano. Her plays and monologues have been published by Dramatic Publishing and appear in anthologies by Smith & Kraus, Heinemann, Penguin, and Vintage Books. Her poetry and fiction have appeared in Blithe House Quarterly, Kalliope, Whiskey Island, and Anything That Moves. She lives in Cleveland, Ohio.

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